Living IN this world but not OF it: A TRUE STORY OF AWAKENING

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There is a peace I have discovered that surpasses this world entirely.  It is a peace that has been achieved only through departing from all I once knew and awakening at last to what is the truth.

            It is the peace of knowing I am in this world, but not of it. 

            In a nutshell, it is a mindset – a lifestyle choice. 

            I use an analogy for viewing our experience in the world that completely removes all fear for me, and it is this: we are living in a sandbox.

            What do I mean by this? 

            This world is a sandbox because it is a place where false ideas may be played out and examined at length without any type of permanent consequences.  It is not a real place because nothing in it is eternal.  We are indeed like little children playing make-believe in a giant sandbox.  And like children often do, we have conflicts during our make-believe adventures. Sometimes we throw sand at one another in the hopes of influencing the actions of others through violence.  And sometimes people destroy what we have built.  All in all, it is an emotionally hostile and toxic place to be while so many of us are trying to enact our own make-believe worlds, which are in constant conflict with one another as we try to carve out our own little sandcastles of happiness.

            And yet, I have arrived at a state of inner peace and learned to walk through our sandbox-world without fear.  How did I learn this?

            This story has many previous steps to it of course, however there was one pivotal experience that elevated my mind above the childishness of the sandbox-games and into a realm of peace – one that was no idle fantasy; one that taught me how to live in this world and know that I am not of it.

            In December of 2018 I received some disturbing, yet exciting news: the pharmacy where I had been employed as a pharmacist for the last 14 years was closing its doors in 7 days – exactly a week before Christmas.  This news was disturbing for obvious reasons; I was completely caught off guard, had no idea where I was going to work or what to do next.  Yet this news was also exciting to me because a year earlier the Voice of the Holy Spirit within me told me that in 2019 I would no longer be working for my present employer.  No further information was offered on this topic, and so I assumed my next adventure would be, well, a very happy one.

            As with all things here in the sandbox, such assumptions should never be made.

            I wound up working for a company where everything I once enjoyed and took for granted at my old job was either missing or were horribly wrong.  My new place of employment was a high volume, intensely stressful and chaotic environment.  The only thing I liked about it was the people who worked there; everything else was pure suffering and misery.  When at home, I cried often – and I’m not a crier by a long shot.  I found myself in a near constant state of anxiety and fear, and I was filled with a deep sense of dread before, during, and after each shift. 

            After just a couple of weeks, I found myself drifting down into a depression I had never known and I was already looking for a new job.

            I fell deep into the sandbox dream – the nightmarish realm where all our fears are real and we frantically seek escape in some way or another.

            However, I knew the answer to my problem was not outside myself.  I had been studying A Course In Miracles since 2004, and I knew from what I had learned that all things outside myself were a projection of my own thoughts.  And so I also knew that the predicament I had landed in represented nothing more than my own thoughts in need of forgiveness.  

            My problem then was how do I forgive this mess so I can be happy?

            I was at the lowest point of my life; the unhappiest I had been in as long as I could remember. How does one climb out of such a dark place without change first coming to their outer circumstances?  How does one find joy within the darkness while they’re still in it?

            What happened next was truly a miracle.

            I had been with my new employer for a total of 7 months, all the while applying for one job after another, only to be turned down for one reason or another.  The pharmacy job market had changed immensely since I had last looked for a job 14 years prior, and had become highly competitive.  

             At the 6-month mark of employment, something remarkable happened.  I read something that morning in the Text of A Course In Miracles that I had seen before, but this time it stopped me dead in my tracks, and it was this:

            “There is no statement that the world is more afraid to hear than this:

I do not know the thing I am, and therefore do not

 know what I am doing, where I am, or how to look

 upon the world or myself.

            Yet in this learning is salvation born.  And What you are will tell you of Itself.”  (ACIM Text Ch.31 V.17:6-9)

            My very next thought was, “Why does admitting “I do not know anything,” cause the world to be afraid? Why does such a thought threaten it and trigger salvation instead?

            The Holy Spirit immediately answered me within my mind with this:

            “When you admit you do not know what anything in the world means, you withdraw your judgment from it, and therefore wipe clean from your mind all previous assumptions.  This creates an open space for something new; a new thought, free of the ego’s definitions.  This is what forgiveness is.  This is forgiveness in action, applied to the world around you.  And when you forgive the world, it shifts, because your perception of it has shifted. You are now projecting a new world, one that is lead quietly ahead by Me, rather than being driven forcefully forward by your ego.  The world fears this shift because it knows it cannot remain as it is, once you have forgiven it.”

            I then wondered, “But how do I do this?  How do I forgive the world?”

            To which the Holy Spirit replied, “Can you at least admit you do not understand your current circumstances?  Can you at least admit you do not know why you are experiencing what is happening to you now in your present working conditions?

            I responded with a resounding, “Yes!  Yes I can easily do that!  I already feel that way deep inside right now.”

            “Then you have already taken the first great step towards letting go of all you ever thought you knew and understood about the world.  It is the first step in knowing you do not know the thing you are, what you are doing, where you are or how to look upon the world or yourself.  In this simple release of judgment, lies the release of everything outside of you.” 

            And with that thought, something made a dramatic shift within me.  For the first time in 6 months, I felt no anxiety or fear in any form. Everything that was bound up tight and painful inside me simply let go and a deep abiding peace moved into its place.

            I drove to work that day in a constant state of forgiveness – a state of peace, knowing I didn’t have to solve any problems at all.  My current circumstances were simply something I was moving through – my work was a place I went to, to practice this newfound release of forgiveness. I didn’t know why I was there, who I was in relation to those around me, or what anything in my environment was for. I was simply there to forgive it. To understand that it was not my job to judge my circumstances, but to accept that I didn’t understand them, thus forgiving them, which made room for God’s peace.

            I arrived at work that day on a horribly busy Monday morning.  Retail pharmacies are notoriously busy on Monday’s and this one was no exception.  However, I felt no fear upon walking through the door.

            Then a most remarkable thing happened.  I found myself inside some sort of “bubble of peace.”  I saw the world around me unfolding, but it was as though I was looking at the chaos from a serene vantage point from somewhere else – a place that was untouchable.  I went about my work, solving all the problems and dealing with each crisis as I normally would, but there was a powerful sense of quiet surrounding my mind and all I seemed to do.  Despite the chaos, there was a deep hush pervading my space.

            Then an even more remarkable thing happened.  People around me also began to notice the shift.  My coworkers began to comment on the peaceful atmosphere of the pharmacy. They were amidst the chaos just the same as me, and they were also experiencing the same peace that I was! Somehow my “bubble” extended to my surroundings in a very real way.  Several customers even commented on how peaceful the pharmacy seemed that day – one even compared it to the feel of a spa!

            This mental state of living in the world, but not being a participant in its fear continued on for 3 more days.  On the third day I received a phone call from one of the companies I had applied with a month earlier, offering me a job.  

            I am still working for that pharmacy today, and it has been by far the best job I’ve ever had.  

            I want to point out that my peace arrived before my outer circumstances shifted.  My inner shift happened first, then my outer world shifted to match my new inner state; I had changed what I was projecting onto the world outside me.

            Through forgiveness, I had moved above the childish sandbox-world and into the peace of God, and became the observer, rather than the participant.  

            When one does this, you step aside and let God lead the way, and what He has in mind for you is beyond this world entirely.  Never forget: this sandbox is not your world.  You’re just passing through as an ambassador from God.  You are in it, but not of it.

            And as to how I came to understand this world is nothing more than a sandbox in the first place, is another story entirely… 

Beth Geer is the author of Awakening to One Love, a compilation of messages she received from the Holy Spirit over a 10-year period as she studied A Course In Miracles.

NOTE: If you would like to watch THE VIDEO of this article, PLEASE CLICK HERE!